Kevin Bloody Wilson - I Gave Up Wanking
I give up wankin this mornin
I never thought that I could,
and I'm feeling better already,
this time I'm off it for good.
When I first wanked I thought I was so clever
And all of me mates, they were mugs
Thought I was the first Bloke here on Earth
who'd ever played with his slug
It was me own little secret,
I never told anyone
And the feelin I got, the first time I shot
Was like chooks flying outta me bum
So I'm givin up wankin' tomorrow,
I never thought that I could
I'll be glad to get rid of these headaches,
Then I'll be off it for good
I've wanked in some unlikely places,
The shower, the beach and the pool,
the dunny, a tram and the pictures,
biology classes at school.
And once my grandmother caught me,
wanking meself in me room,
But to her suprise,
I just shut me eyes and imagined her standin there nude.
I'm givin up wankin on tuesdee
I never thought that I could
Then I won't squint like I do now,
Then I'll be off it for good.
Me dad says it's gonna take will-power
There really is no easy trick,
I honestly thought I'd need surgery
To help get me hand orf me dick
Me dad's been a great inspiration,
He's really been a great help,
He knows what I go through,
And just what to do,
Cause he give it up yest'dee himself,
So I'm givin up wankin next Fridee
I never thought that I could
and I won't have to wear these thick glasses,
then I'll be off it for good
So if you say you don't wank,
Your a liar,
And a fool if you say that you do,
So next time you see,
Prince Charles on TV
Remember he wanked himself too,
So I'm givin up wankin come Christmas,
I never thought that I could
And I'll sell me dog and me white cane,
and then I'll be off it for good
I'm givin up wankin next Easter
I never thought that I could,
and the warts on me hand will just vanish
then I'll be off it for good
I'm givin up wankin' next August,
I never thought that I could.....
More Kevin Bloody Wilson's lyrics
Absolute Cunt Of A Day
Dilligaf
Ho Ho Fucking Ho
I Gave Up Wanking
Kid (He Swears A Bit)
Kristmas Without Snow
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| Artist:
Kevin Bloody Wilson |
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| Title:I Gave Up Wanking
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| Submit by:Jim
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